Reading Review: April 2019

It's been a pretty busy month, with starting new jobs and celebrating my 22nd birthday (!) I read four books, which were mostly underwhelming. Lots of newbies on my TBR pile to look forward to though...

First up... The Nine-Chambered Heart by Janice Pariat (5/5)

Inspired in part by Anaïs Nin's The Four-Chambered Heart, this novel explores the relationships which make us who we are. We hear from nine (though I'm pretty sure one is repeated) people who knew the protagonist, and loved her. From three-night stands on holiday to year long affairs, we see her from a teenager right through to middle age through the lens of these lovers. I wish it didn't stop so abruptly but I can see how this represents her tendency to abandon situations unexpectedly.  The subtle shifts in narrative throughout was also done well so it was hardly noticeable. I adored this.

Notes to Self by Emilie Pine (4/5)

Emilie's memoir explores her memories of having an alcoholic parent, dealing with infertility and everyday sexism. She documents some of her sexual experiences where consent is blurred, bravely confronting feelings of shame and confusion. She is openly aware of the vulnerability of her younger self, and still remains able to consider how others might look back at the same events differently.

The Course of Love by Alain de Botton (2/5)

This is essentially a philosophical commentary on a fictional relationship, dissecting their love at different stages. I found his take on parenting and attachment styles interesting, but I didn't connect with the characters at all. The novel would probably have worked better if it were an essay collection.

Laughable Loves by Milan Kundera. (2/5)

I loved Kundera's The Unbearable Lightness of Being, and this story collection deals with similar themes of sexual attraction, games of desire and love. My only issue with these were that a majority of the main characters seem identical - in their longings and attitudes. It gets a bit repetitive, but I still liked the stories themselves.

Reading Review: March 2019

How To Come Alive Again by Beth McColl (5/5) 

This is filled with realistic approaches to self care and advice on helping others when they're having panic or anxiety attacks, depressive episodes, etc. It's slightly repetitive in some sections, but other than that, it ticks all the boxes. Beth's writing always manages to be both funny and wise. This comes out in April.

'We know that bravery is in the little resistances, the dishwasher filled and turned on. the late bill paid. The floor hoovered, the call to the doctor made, the window open. The light coming in.'

'Figure out what trips you up and then make knee pads. Metaphorical knee pads.'

'Reality doesn't change with longing. It changes with gradual and deliberate action.'

Sal by Mick Kitson  (4/5)

Two sisters on the run in rural Scotland, told from the perspective of thirteen-year-old Sal. The story deals with abuse, alcoholism and sisterly love. Armed with an air gun, Always ultra pads and a brain filled with YouTube tutorials, Sal and her sister learn to survive in the wilderness. This feels similar to Room, heartwarming and heartbreaking in equal measure.


Lanny by Max Porter (5/5)

Max is known for playing with language, his debut Grief is The Thing With Feathers is a blend of poetry and novella and Lanny is equally playful. Words and sentences swirl across pages as we are able to eavesdrop on the locals in the story. Set in a village just outside of London where a young boy goes missing, this is convincing, gripping and unlike anything I've read in a long time. I saw Max perform an edited version at the Southbank Centre with Stephen Mangan, Lydia Wilson and Kenneth Cranham, which definitely transformed the reading experience. I've heard that he will be organising similar events in the future, so look into that if you fancy.

The Peculiar Life of a Lonely Postman by Denis Thériault (5/5)

I'm so glad I found this hiding in a charity shop last month. It's only short, but packed with emotion and curiosity. A postman intercepts handwritten letters and reads them before sending them on to their destination. His life changes entirely when he reads a letter which has only a single haiku on the page. It becomes quite eerie and I was hooked.


How The Light Gets In by Clare Fisher (3/5)

This is a collection of short stories on contemporary life, which are funny and observational. Similarly to her debut All The Good Things, these stories are powerful and realistic. I like the variation of form; some are more like lists (things smartphones make you less likely to do when alone, in a public space) and others micro fiction. Please mind the gap is one of my favourites.

'Dragging its feet through the gap is the you who rang your grandma even though the thought of ringing your grandma makes you want to sneeze (...) by the time you hung up, the heat from your listening ear was spilling right down to your heart'. 

Adèle by Leïla Slimani (1/5)

This was a disappointment. I'd heard people rave about Lullaby and The Perfect Nanny, but this 'thriller' just felt flat. Adèle lives in Paris with her husband and son and works as a journalist. The story is essentially about her sex addiction and how it consumes her life. I'm not sure if listening to this altered how I felt about it, but the protagonist's constant boredom and cynicism was frustrating.


Roar by Cecilia Ahern (1/5)

The ideas in this short story collection are great, but they fell short for me. The magical realism elements often weren't believable, and the dialogue felt forced and unnatural throughout. Rather than being able to interpret the meaning in each story, we are spoon-fed. Each metaphor is literally spelt out and the consequences are frustratingly predictable.


Yours Always: Letters of Longing by Eleanor Bass (3/5)

This collection gives us an insight into lovers throughout history and the letters they crafted for each other. Featuring some well known poets, actors, writers and politicians, this was great to dip into. Also gets a thumbs up for the LGBT+ representation.


Something Like Breathing by Angela Readman (5/5)

Beautifully written, Something Like Breathing tells the story of an island in the 1950s. Focused on two girls, Lorrie and Sylvie who become neighbours and almost-friends, this captures the messiness of teenage friendships perfectly. Next to their houses sits Lorrie's grandfather's whisky distillery, so each new character that is introduced is given a profile, described by their palate, scent and finish. It's a tiny detail which works so well, giving everyone just enough depth. There's also a small element of magical realism as Sylvie hides a strange secret.

Three Women by Lisa Taddeo (5/5)

Lisa shares the stories of three American women, one whose childhood sweetheart becomes the answer to a marriage crisis, one whose husband suggests they start bringing third parties into their sex life, and another who had a relationship with her teacher in high school. The desires, obsessions and affairs these women experience all have consequences. This book explores them and remind us how often we dismiss and judge people who have suffered without having heard them out. It’s fascinating and I won’t be forgetting these women anytime soon. This is out in July. 

Reading Review: February 2019

Despite it being the shortest month of the year, I was pretty happy with the range of genres I read in February. There's romance & erotica, business & self-help, poetry, personal essays and comedy. See what I thought of each below.

Persuasive Copywriting by Andy Maslen (4/5) 

I found this really helpful, and it answered a lot of questions I had about copywriting. The chapters cover techniques to identify the reader or customer, improve your writing and get from theory to profit. It's easy to dip into, and reads like a genuine conversation, which I liked. The exercises don't make you want to claw your eyes out either, which makes a nice change from some workbooks I've read before.

Meet Me at The Museum by Anne Youngson (5/5) 

This is about a woman getting in touch with a museum curator in Denmark, enquiring about the mummified man from the Iron Ages she's spent her life thinking about. Their correspondence continues and their friendship deepens. The book is structured in letters, similarly to 84, Charing Cross Road, which I personally love. This is about regret, choices and finding companions in later life - which isn't something I've read much about previously. So heartwarming.

My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh (3/5)

This is a darkly comic novel about a woman who decides to medicate herself (under the supervision of a questionable psychiatrist) so that she can 'hibernate' for a year. The protagonist is really unlikeable, but I was curious about what would happen to her, and if she would ever stop being so cynical. I found this interesting, but I didn't find myself that excited to keep reading.

Undying by Michel Faber (3/5) 

This is Michel's debut poetry collection, which he wrote during his wife's six-year battle with cancer. I liked a fair few of the poems, and admittedly they are very powerful, but for some reason I didn't connect with them that much. Regardless, this is a sweet extract:

'All I can do, in what remains of my brief time, 

is mention, to whoever cares to listen,

that a woman once existed, who was kind

and beautiful and brave, and I will not forget

how the world was altered, beyond recognition,

when we met.' 

We Are Never Meeting in Real Life by Samantha Irby (5/5) 

I cry-laughed my way through this entire essay collection. It's brilliantly written and genuinely hilarious. There's the painfully realistic job application, accounts of awkward sexual encounters and an eye-wateringly funny description of scattering her father's ashes. Samantha isn't necessarily self-deprecating, but she's just honest. There's no 'confessional' or embarrassed tone, just raw, ridiculous and heartbreaking stories shared.

The Pisces by Melissa Broder (2/5) 
~ Book Club Read ~

I'm still unsure about this one, which is a shame as I'd heard great things about it. It's about a woman house and dog-sitting for her sister in L.A. for the summer. She's going to group therapy and avoiding writing her thesis. As she deals with her existential angst (I feel you girl), she meets a mystical man. So apparently merman erotica is a thing... Who knew? Melissa is skilled in making these bizarre sex scenes seem utterly normal, but the dialogue was unrealistic and cringeworthy. Overall, it's disturbing with a deflating ending.

The Fire Starter Sessions by Danielle LaPorte (5/5)

I bought a copy of this for my brother's birthday, and figured I might as well get one for myself, too. I'd say this is for students, innovators, lovers, salespeople, project managers, lost souls - everyone. This book is a 'soulful and practical guide to creating success on your own terms'. I wrote over thirty pages of notes whilst reading, and have been sharing quotes with anyone who will listen. It's incredible.

Living The Dream by Lauren Berry (4/5)

This follows the lives of two fictional writers in their late twenties, trying to escape the mundanity and live their dreams in London. The honest inner dialogue and commentary on being stuck in a job you hate is hilarious, and there are witty one-liners throughout. It's been compared to Bridget Jones, and for good reason. I loved Lauren's sarcastic tone and the short chapters are perfect for dipping into.

~    ~    ~

Here's February's playlist, for good measure: PLAY ME

x

It Takes A Bookshelf: Poem & Analysis

It Takes A Bookshelf

The girls cut snowflakes

out of books.

They snip and scatter confetti 

in the kitchen,

fling spines from the staircase.

We should hide the matches,

I suggest to no one in particular. They might

be gathering kindling.

The pair build and bend and break, and

blink.

I do not question why 

they choose to make Christmas decorations 

in February. 

They still exist somewhere the calendar 

doesn’t quite reach.

They peel the icing from birthday cakes,

carry broomsticks like handbags, 

and remind the Easter bunny

he is welcome here,

anytime. 

Now, 

hear them hum carols through toothpaste bubbles. 

Outside, the grown-ups dodge puddles, 

and play their games of eternal, internal 

hide and seek. 

At bathtime

the girls transform soggy pages

into paper boats

and sail a select few into another night. 

~ ~ ~

The title is a play on the phrase, 'it takes a village', but I wanted the poem to be less about what it takes to raise children (and what we give), but instead, how they use what life throws their way. How they pick their favourite parts to make the everyday playful, and reject what simply doesn't serve them. 

The flinging of spines from the staircase is intended to reference the cracking of book spines and ‘breaking’ of rules. Everyone usually encourages each other to preserve our books – to look after them. The seemingly careless behaviour and chaos are something I wanted to describe differently. To see how scribbling and scrunching and abandoning norms can lead to something good. 

So ‘carols’ and ‘toothpaste bubbles’ show a contrast of routine and tradition with fun and celebration, of finding joy in the mundane. The humming (hopefully) gives connotations of lullabies, signalling that time in this scene has passed, and we are now observing them in an evening setting. I like how bubbles almost rhymes with the end of the following line - ‘puddles’, implying an overlap. Suggesting that the barrier we create between being young and old doesn’t need to be as strong as we might think.

This is, unsurprisingly, inspired by my cousins, who are almost always cutting up my important papers and making ‘origami’ from old, unloved leaflets. They are absolute monkeys, and the future is lucky to have them. 

Thanks for reading,

X

Your Own Valentine

We all know that Shrove Tuesday is officially the day of love (just me?), but we'll make an exception this year. Whether you're actively avoiding or embracing Galentine's and Palentine's with open arms, here are some of my favourites to watch and read which celebrate all forms of love. I've also included some people to follow on social media who always cheer me up.

WATCH:

• One Day. Because it's the one day of the year we're encouraged to sob into ice cream. This is heartbreaking, and addictively so. 

• About Time. This will change how you approach every single day of your life. Or it might, anyway. It's got a strong emphasis on family and choices, and manages to jump from comedy to tragedy in moments. 

                    

READ: 

• The Time Traveler's Wife. This is about the unpredictable life of a couple whose relationship is affected by the husband's sudden time travelling. It's different, moving and memorable.

• Becoming. I'm a huge fan of Laura Jane Williams, and this is her memoir about becoming celibate, living in an Italian convent for six months and recreating her life post-break up. If you're needing some Eat, Pray, Love, this is a good place to start. 

• This Modern Love. A gorgeous coffee table number that is perfect for self-gifting. This is a collection of letters, stories and photographs sharing love at their beginnings, middles and endings. With sassy exes, seductions and simple confessions, there's something in this which will hit a nerve with all readers.

• The Last Act of Love. Another non-fiction suggestion, Cathy’s brother Matty was in a car accident in 1990 which left him in a permanent vegetative state. Her story is about making the hard decision to let him go, and it’s one which stayed with me for years. Prepare yourself, it’s an emotional read which will have you fiercely texting your siblings at 2am...

                                       

                                    


FOLLOW: 

• The Slumflower A.K.A Chidera Eggarue. My go-to for her no-nonsense approach to relationships and self care. Her book 'What A Time To Be Alone' is out now. She's funny, eloquent and dares to confront what most avoid talking about. 

• Leena Norms. Book-loving, social change promoting, brilliant human. Find her on Twitter and Youtube. 

• Matt Haig. Matt's posts brighten my Twitter feed, and he writes incredible books too. 

• Jessica Dore. Jessica shares therapeutic tarot readings with scientific interpretations. I didn't think this would be my thing, but her Instagram and Twitter posts resonate with me, and are practical rather than unreliable and mystical.  Check 'em out. 

🖤

 

Reading Review: January 2019

This month has felt like an absolute eternity, yet somehow the Christmas cheese is still going strong (anyone for three-cheese risotto, again?) I've read ten books this month, mainly because doing laps of the local park with a sleeping baby means ploughing through audiobooks at a ridiculous rate. I'm a big fan of this au-pair lifestyle, if you can't already tell... Anyway, here's what I thought of them:

If Cats Disappeared From The World by Genki Kawamura (4/5)

A young man with a terminal brain tumour creates a bucket list of sorts after being visited by the devil - who in this novel is a lively character named Aloha, dressed in a Hawaiian shirt. Aloha offers the man another day of life for every item he removes from the world: Phones, clocks, movies, etc... What happens when these things no longer exist? Who suffers the consequences? I found it bittersweet and funny.

Convenience Store Woman by Sayaka Murata (1/5)

I'd heard great things about this one, with people praising its simplicity and dark humour. It's similar to Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine, but it was missing something, and was annoyingly repetitive. I stuck it out to the end (I hate not finishing books), but wouldn't recommend.

Earth Is Hiring by Peta Kelly (3/5)

Peta Kelly offers a no-nonsense approach to business, life, relationships and more. Her perspective is inspiring, and for the most part I liked listening to the audiobook, but there were issues I couldn't ignore. For a start, she almost accuses our attitude to money as being the reason we may not have enough of it. This is clearly a privileged view, and ignores the reality of poverty and complex relationships with money. I also don't see how being 'kinder' to money is practical advice for budgeting and managing our incomes... That being said, having this sweary, positive voice in my ears was uplifting, and I'd still recommend giving it a try.

Ghost Wall by Sarah Moss (4/5)

This is the first in mine and Lizzie's 2019 book club (find her here!) and we both loved it. It's similar to Our Endless Numbered Days, though far less creepy. Our protagonist Silvie is on a trip with her parents and a group of university students who are studying archaeology. Her father is obsessed with the way humans lived in the Iron Age, and insists that his family re-enact the lifestyle. Which, as you can imagine, escalates dangerously. The book captures how being in a different environment can feel like an entirely new world.  It's only a small book but it succeeds in covering a lot of topics: authority, sexism, parenting and friendship.

I Might Regret This by Abbi Jacobson (3/5)

Abbi Jacobson is a comedian, writer, actress, and fellow over thinker. She's also the co-creator of Broad City (which I've not seen yet). She documents her road trip from New York to L.A., including illustrations of the albums she listens to, and the books she reads on her journey. I loved her essays and ramblings, but the book could definitely have been edited more and tightened up, as it feels quite thrown together. She processes her anxieties and loss - of a relationship and saying goodbye to a show that she's dedicated a chunk of her life to. It's vulnerable, relatable, and genuinely funny.

Wild by Cheryl Strayed (4/5)

From one woman's solo trip to another, I finally read Cheryl Strayed's Wild. It's a classic for a reason - empowering, heartbreaking, inspiring. After her mother's death, a divorce, and addiction, Cheryl impulsively decides to hike the Pacific Crest Trail - alone, and with no previous wilderness survival experience. It made me want to squeeze my mother, and get out there to experience the kindness of strangers, though I'll happily stick to hostels, instead of a 2,000+ mile hike...

The Sadness of Beautiful Things by Simon Van Booy (3/5)

Inspired by the true stories he's heard over the years, Simon has written this collection. They touch on how tragedy and grief can impact our lives, and they do so brilliantly. Some are hopeful insights into lives, others are bizarre apocalyptic tales, and many end with twists that change the entire narrative. One of my favourites was about an accident involving a child wearing VR glasses which felt like it was straight out of a Black Mirror episode.

'Maybe that's what ghosts are, he thought, feelings so strong they get away'. 

Her Body & Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado (4/5)

Carmen's debut collection is definitely my favourite read this month, and filled the Angela Carter shaped hole in my life I hadn't noticed was missing. These stories are a mixture of science fiction, horror and fairytale, dealing with power, violence and women's bodies. The star for me was 'Husband Stitch', in which a woman wears a velvet ribbon around her neck that her husband and son are forbidden to touch. In 'Inventory', a woman lists her sexual encounters as a virus kills off humanity. This reminded me of Perfect Sense, and falling in love in a time of global chaos.

Monogamy by Adam Phillips (4/5)

My sister gifted me this collection for Christmas and I loved it. There are 121 short thoughts on monogamy, infidelity and life spent seeking that one 'perfect' other. I found the perspectives on the dependent nature of children and their understandings of our many commitments as adults really interesting. Adam manages to be neutral and funny while observing our obsession with problematic relationships as a society.

'Every marriage is a blind date that makes you wonder what the alternatives are to a blind date'.

'A couple is a conspiracy in search of a crime. Sex is often the closest they can get'.

Midnight Chicken & Other Recipes Worth Living For by Ella Risbridger (5/5)

This is a memoir-cookbook hybrid, which is by far my favourite genre. It's filled with Ella's reflections on the times food saved her. Her partner, John (who she credits for teaching her how to cook) died last year and so ultimately, the book is a love letter to him. I've already made a few of the recipes and can confirm that they are delicious and do-able, even on Bad Days and when a tiny bit drunk. Her writing is gentle and realistic as she guides you through the cooking process. Warning to everyone I know: I'll probably gift you a copy of this at some point, because we all need one.

'Onions, like heartbreak or fine wines, only get better with time'

~ ~ ~ ~

Here's what I've been listening to this month: January Playlist 

Top Ten Books of 2018

So 2018 was an intense reading year, especially when I was finishing up my dissertation in the first few months. Those that I didn't review on here, their ratings are up on my Good Reads and can be found here! In total I read 57 books, and have chosen my ten favourites to recommend. 

(Illustration by Manuela Gandara)

Here goes...

1) Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier. This is one for the Gatsby fans, as it has equally haunting elements. A young woman marries a mysterious man, moves into his huge house and discovers the eerie consequences of replacing his previous wife. I'm so happy Lizzie suggested this one and endorsed ignoring final assignments to finish it in a single day. 

2) Everything I Know About Love by Dolly Alderton.  I'm pretty sure this was my first ever audible purchase, and it was a good one to start with. Journalist and dating columnist, Dolly Alderton, shares some of the stories and lessons she's learnt in life so far. From WhatsApp romances to landlord-related catastrophes, she celebrates not always having her shit together - something we should all be doing more of... It's funny, heartbreakingly relatable and will remind you how valuable a cuddle with a best friend can be. 

3) Ice-cream for Breakfast by Laura Jane Williams. I listened to this once I'd handed in my final university assignment and left a long term relationship. Essentially: My 'What now?' moment. This book showed me how I could start building a work-life balance which suited me. It gave me permission to abandon the idea of a linear career path, and so much more. Laura writes about the time she took a break from writing to be a nanny, and how being more childlike can change our adult lives. She doesn't sugar coat things, and yet her words are gentle and reassuring. This is literally bravery in a book, and would make a great gift for anyone who feels a little lost in life. 

4) Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng. In this, an artist and single mother moves to a town with a tightly knit community. Her hidden past and unconventional parenting approach causes relationships to unravel and secrets to find their way out. We're reminded as readers that trying to control everything often leads to chaos. Also one of the main characters is called Mia, so I couldn't help but like it that little bit more...

5) Normal People by Sally Rooney. This won the Waterstones' book of the year award, and introduced me to this author. The book follows two school friends in an Irish town as they grow up together (and apart). Sally has an incredible writing style, and makes dialogue seem effortless. The story captures the particular sadness of drifting apart from friends, and the particular nostalgia of on-and-off relationships over the years. 

6) Conversations with Friends by Sally Rooney. This is probably my favourite out of the two Sally Rooney novels, but I loved them both. Sally writes sex scenes like no-one else (though Caitlin Moran is also a pro), which are equal parts awkward, realistic, funny and intriguing. This story is about a young aspiring writer who gets involved with a married man and is thrown into a new world, observing 'adults'. I loved that the characters make controversial decisions, because who wants to read about flawless humans?

7) I couldn't not include the sequel to How to Build a Girl. Caitlin Moran's How to be Famous explores the life of a writer in London, navigating the world of Bad Men and the 90s music scene. Caitlin's pearls of wisdom can be found on every page, and her writing never fails to make me laugh.  You could definitely read this without reading the first in the series, but I'd recommend you still read that before the third comes out. 

8) I spoke about Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie here, but ultimately it was a fairly short novel which had me hooked. It gives a perspective on Isis that I'd never previously considered, and I genuinely found myself caring about the characters involved. It won the Women's Prize for Fiction 2018, which was well deserved.  

9) I heard about This Really Isn't About You by Jean Hannah Edelstein in the newsletter Conversations on Love (subscribe here). Jean writes about moving across the world, the absurdity of grieving, and how dating can make us lose our sense of self. She turns everyday thoughts, experiences and observations into memorable and special moments. She speaks about how having non-romantic love in our lives is what counts, and what will be best for our wellbeing. Word of warning: it's a sad one, and touches often on mortality, but I couldn't put it down. 

10) My final favourite book of 2018 was The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafón. This gave me the same fuzzy feeling as the Inkheart series gave my 12 year old self. It's set in Barcelona, and introduces us to 'the cemetery of forgotten books'. I loved diving into this with limited information beforehand, so I won't say too much here, just that it's a great story. I've heard that the second two books in the series aren't as impressive, so I won't be rushing to start those yet. 

That's a wrap! What did you read in 2018?

With best wishes for the new year,

Mia